Perspective

Sometimes I am left wondering about my attachment to reality. I know you are shocked to hear that (not really.....lol). I have gone from a life of relative inactivity to the opposite extreme, and yet I still find myself feeling like a total sloth when I compare myself to the people I surround myself with socially. And by socially I mean some pretty hardcore, driven triathlete type people. People who get up early to swim or workout, bike all the time, and who give you shit if you take a rest day that wasn't on the plan because you are tired, it's rainy, or life got in the way a bit. I can always seem to find a way to compare myself to these folks and feel inferior to their skill or their perseverance.

Is that really reality?

Once in a while I get a snippet of how "regular people" see me and what I do. A few months back, Mike was bantering around with some of Lucas's friends on Facebook, talking to them about how he was willing to help them organize a summer running group. Justin referred to us as "the running gods of Janesville." As in Mike and I. Running.GODS. ....... Really? My first thought was that the poor child really should get out more and meet some folks. Most days I don't feel particularly god-like. Chugging Freight Train, maybe. Not a God.

Tonight, I was kicking myself for going for dinner and postponing a scheduled run. We ran into someone who works in the same building as Mike. He introduced to his wife, who said "Oh, you guys are THE Athletes." It really took a lot to stifle a big giggle. She called me an ATHLETE! Ha! As is athletic..... as in skilled, fast, maybe nimble even....... An.Athlete. Interesting, since I really have a hard time classifying what I do as athletic. It is slow, sometimes painful, almost always slower than those around me, hardly what I would call athletic. But I guess it is a matter of perspective and what you see as your own reality. I surround myself with people I consider athletes so that I can learn from them, draw motivation from them, and hope that someday, somehow I can achieve 1/10th their speed, strength, and stamina. But to someone who has more contact with mere mortals and not superhero types? maybe, just maybe, I might qualify to be way far in the back of the pack of what might be called athletes........

OK, you can call me an athlete, but you have to use air quotes when you say it, that's the new rule.

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Vocabulary Lesson

Well folks, it's been a while since I've done much posting here instead of snarky comments on Facebook. Sorry for that. I brew up some great blog posts out on my long runs and rides, but somehow life gets in the way and I just don't find the time in the day to put those thoughts into the written word.

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about what people can achieve. It seems it was not that long ago that I found myself making excuses for why I couldn't possibly do things. Going for a walk with my dogs, hopping on a bike, losing 20 pounds, doing anything active or social was pretty much out. I was plagued with excuses.... too much to do for work, too much stress in my life to participate in life rather than watch, too much I had to manage for my kids, my home, my job, my yard, my everything. "I can't," "I won't," "I'll never" were integral parts of my vocabulary.

What I've learned over the past few years, is that the only thing that holds a person back from achieving anything is the restrictions they place on themselves in their own mind.

As I was running tonight, my mind wanders. I was trying to find the motivation to keep moving and found myself repeating the same idea over and over to keep going. "You can do anything for a minute," which quickly became "for a block," "for a mile," and "until you get home." I bargain with myself a lot that way, gutting it out to the next goal and then setting new ones. I think really that is the key - setting your mind on a goal and realizing that your mind is what holds you back, not your body. My friend Alison's go-to phrase in Ironman training is "Forward is a Pace" and I find applications for that mantra almost every day.

Often I find myself in conversations with people about how I got to where I am today. I don't solicit this, because really I am still a little awkward about discussing it and the attention it brings. In my mind, it really isn't so special - anyone could do it if they were in the right frame of mind. But, with that said, if someone wants to pick my brain or find motivation, I want to encourage others to achieve for themselves. People ask how much weight I lost. When I respond with the truth - 185 pounds lost initially- I start to hear the excuses. They say "I could never do that because (insert reason)..." They ask about my training, then tell me how they could never do that because they have bad knees, bad backs, asthma, smoke too much, smoked too many years, or any other of a variety of "I can'ts."

I struggle for the right responses to this. It seems rude to tell them to stop making excuses, but really that is what I feel would be in their best interests, someone to shock them into changing their frame of reference. My response is often that it's not so special, anyone could do it if they put their mind to it..... and I honestly believe it's true.

So for the future, I think my advice will be to change your vocabulary. You aren't on a diet, you are changing your lifestyle. You aren't training for an event, you are training for your life. You need to take "can't", couldn't", and "never" out of your vocabulary, it closes your mind and only holds you back from your possibilities. Change the way you look at things - think about how you could make something happen, not about how you could NEVER make something happen.

You can't run? Fine, then walk. Can't walk? Stroll! Can't stroll? Then crawl. Can't swim laps? Do the dog paddle, go water walking, or whatever. Do what you can and make the most of it, the only thing holding you back is your mind telling you to stop, or worse that you shouldn't even start. it's a in your head and how you think about things.

You've got to start somewhere so it might as well be here.

Tour de Cure

next month Mike and I will be riding in the Tour De Cure ride in honor of our neice Sarah.
Here is the link to the page describing our story. (and Mike's page)

Juvenile Diabetes affects so many young lives. We want to see a cure, not just a means of managing this disease. If you can help us with a pledge, large or small, it would be appreciated. If you aren't able to help, please donate your time, write a letter to support funding, say a prayer, or whetever you can find within you to help JDRF.

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Learning to blog from the Blackberry

We just found that we can upload. Blog posts from the phone. How cool is that?
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It's business time, people!

What can I say? Its been a while since I have felt much like putting more than a few smart-mouthed comments on my Facebook page and really getting down to business.

I am currently in the last couple days of week 3 of Ironman training, which is going pretty uneventfully. I have managed to get in almost every workout, with the exception of a few swims which is directly related to a distinct lack of pool availability rather than a motivational deficiency.

I have missed only 1 run, which I think is nearly miraculous since I can find every excuse in the book not to run. I am not not fast by any means, but my big fat butt is out there pounding the pavement on a regular basis. At 14 miles per hour most of the time, which incidentally is about as fast as most people walk. Gotta start somewhere eh?

After reaching an all time high for my weight after my initial weight loss 4 years ago, I am now trending down again. Mike and I have our own version of the Biggest Loser Challenge going, complete with weekly weigh ins and last chance workouts. I of course relish any opportunity to create Excel spreadsheets with formulas and auto-calculations, so that was yet another way for me to put my mad computer skills to work. So far I am down 18 pounds in 5 weeks (next weigh in is tomorrow) with another 20 or so to go. I have even managed to win 2 of the 5 weeks.

I have spent the last week on vacation. We didn't go anywhere, but I needed to take some time off from work for my mental health, and Mike's mom was here for a visit. I think I am full up on my shopping quota for the moment. We had a great visit!

Today we took a short bike with several of the ladies from the tri club (Alison, Kitty, Brenda, Tawnya, and Mike and I). We did a loop of the old Janesville Triathlon route, which was a good mix of rolling hills and wind. We managed to get back to Kitty's just as it started to rain. We are supposed to go on a ride tomorrow in Brodhead, but who knows- it's supposed to rain all day. If that doesn't pan out, we will go to Edgerton to swim at the high school and maybe get in a run (I have 1800m swimming and a 10 mile run on the plan).

Monday is back to work and back to reality. Fitting in all I need to do for work and all I need to do to get my workouts in, be a mom, manage a house, take care of the pups, and managing everything else life throws at ya. It's time to get down to the business of being Supergirl. It's Business Time, Peeps!!

148 days til Ironman Wisconsin

(but who's counting??)